Why I Don’t Use the Word “Alcoholic”, and Why That Matters

It stings when someone calls me an “alcoholic.”

Not because I’m in denial. Not because I’m ashamed of the work I’ve done to change my relationship with alcohol. But because that word, “alcoholic,” is heavy with assumptions, judgment, and stigma. It flattens complex human stories into a single, limiting label. It erases context, identity, and individuality.

And I’m not alone in feeling this way.

The Problem with the Label

Let’s start here: “Alcoholic” isn’t a medical term. It’s a cultural one.

In clinical settings, you’ll hear terms like “alcohol use disorder” to describe the spectrum of alcohol-related challenges. But in everyday language, we default to “alcoholic,” a word that carries decades of stereotypes, misconceptions, and shame.

When people hear “alcoholic,” they often picture someone who’s lost everything: job, home, relationships. Someone drinking in the morning. Someone out of control. The worst-case scenario.

But alcohol dependence doesn’t always look like that.

It can look like the high-achieving executive who drinks every night to cope with stress.
The mom at the playdate who jokes about needing wine to survive parenthood.
The creative…