Happy National Sober Day!
I celebrate today because I am 3 ½ years sober.
I wasn’t always so enthusiastic about ditching the drink.
Believe me, sober was the last resort for me.
I tried everything I could to keep drinking.
I successfully completed 3 years worth of sober challenges.
I participated in Dry January, Sober October, Dry July, and more.
All of these experiments were to prove that I could keep alcohol in my life.
Afterall, if I COULD quit drinking, then I didn’t…
I was talking with a client last week and she mentioned the weekend might be hard.
Because it’s Labor Day, a three day holiday weekend, and the end of summer.
It hit me that I hadn’t even thought about that.
I did have a trip out of town for my Aunt’s Funeral services at the end of the week, prior to the weekend’s start.
I was performing the eulogy, so I was heavily distracted, to say the least.
My oldest daughter had a volleyball tournament,
so we had no plans for a for a last hurrah.
It actually felt…
I always preach #sobertnoboring but the more I think about it…
…maybe I am boring.
Maybe my sober life is boring?
Maybe I don’t have to defend this anymore.
Maybe this will not inspire you to quit drinking.
Maybe this is your biggest fear come true.
It was mine.
I didn’t want to be boring or lose friends, and it happened.
Truth be told…
There are people who don’t want to hang out with me since I’ve quit drinking.
I don’t get invited to events that I used to.
I have lost friends since I quit drinking.
Not at first…
On my vacation we did so much lazing around.
Just napping, sitting, lying, being.
So much nothing.
It was the perfect place to do it.
We were always poolside, with a view of the ocean waves.
Some days we were under the shade of a cabana.
I would read and sleep and swim and read and sleep and swim.
Eating tacos at regular intervals.
Laughing with my kids.
We were all so relaxed.
It was a beautiful escape from the busy hustle of our regular lives.
We had a beautiful soaking tub on our balcony.
Every afternoon my oldest would…
Why cant I stop drinking?
It is a question that has pained millions, including me.
These words are typed into a Google search, daily by people feeling broken, confused, and desperate for answers.
I am here to tell you, there is nothing wrong with you.
It’s not you, it’s alcohol.
I know because I became dependent on alcohol too.
After years of exploration, I came out on the other side.
I had a lot of things going for me, and still I was sucked into alcohol’s hole of despair.
At the end of my relationship with alcohol, I no longer…
I used alcohol to turn off the noise in my head.
I had a very loud inner critic and anxiety about nearly everything.
I love the boozy, woozy, relaxed,
“everything will be ok”
feeling my first sips of wine gave me.
What a relief! From myself.
It honestly felt like the only way to get away from the demanding, persistent, never good enough tape running in the background of my head.
When I quit drinking, I was left to deal with this and it wasn’t pretty.
I can still feel anxiety rising up like a lump in my throat sometimes…
We arrive in Cabo.
We walk off the plane, down the steps, into the Mexican earth.
The kids and I feel like we are getting off of Air Force One and wave to the mountains, as if it they are our adoring audience.
The process of getting into another country is stressful, even as a visitor.
There’s forms to fill out and never enough pens.
There’s too many germs.
There’s confusing repeat questions.
The airport is full of tired travelers, crying babies, and not enough air flow.
My main goal in these situations is to exercise my strong project management…
I am annoyed when people over explain their relationship with social media and here I am doing the same.
I think it’s arrogant to think anyone really cares, but it turns out they do.
And I do too.
I am a solopreneur building my coaching business and Instagram has been a wonderful resource for me.
I inspire and support people in ditching the drink.
The growing sober/alcohol free IG community has been a great tool in my own recovery.
It has also offered a cost effective place to market my offerings.
I love it!
I started like any regular person…
I was driving home this morning from dropping my daughter off at her summer job, and I was thinking about our upcoming all inclusive family vacation.
It hit me that I hadn’t thought about alcohol on this vacation yet and it is quickly approaching.
Alcohol was not a thought in planning it, booking it, or packing for it.
I remember taking a similar vacation a few years ago.
I was excited, anxious, and fully prepared to accomplish my first all inclusive sober vacay.
You can read about it here.
I have also unsuccessfully attempted sober vacations before.
It was painful to get out from under the grip of alcohol dependence.
Time and space from alcohol has changed me, my values, and my priorities.
I am a different person today, than I was on my last Day 1.
I continue to choose to live alcohol free every day.
I have no desire to drink alcohol anymore.
I thought being sober was going to be sad and boring.
I thought I would always feel like I was missing out.
I expected to be jealous of friends that were still drinking.
I am happy to report, that is not at…